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Ironic when a friend speaks of being heartbroken from being left behind and ignored, yet they bring the "end" in the same manner.
I guess that happens when they don't want to hear the truth and the only form of emotional satisfactory comes from being the one to leave the last laugh, to leave a trail of oneself behind and leave things open but no room to tie any knots. An alternative form of desperation to be remembered and reverse the effect of feeling insignificant. 

I felt upset and offended for a bit, then I realized that's probably the whole point; for me to acknowledge and fall for their tactics. Yet upon this realization it only proved to me that the person wasn't meant to be a friend. It only deemed my purpose of moving on from it all much more meaningful. After all, as a human being, I enjoy the sweet taste of spite. Yes, there were some bitter complications in between that made me crave for this, that I also restricted myself from proactively carrying it to prevent further, unnecessary, time consuming, energy inefficient, complications. 

I don't have to do anything directly. Initially my natural tendency to retaliate would make this frustrating, but most of the time, a neutral stance tends to result in the least amount of damage to self. It is also the best method in indirectly "retaliating" to these tactics, as they tend to be self-destructive because of it's very nature of dependence on responses. Often enough, it ends up being self-driven, fed not by my direct response, but the resulting response by the original deliverer of this tactic. 

The best part of this is that I will have a bit more peace of mind than if I had directly responded to the message. After all, this is more of an afterthought or a commentary. 
I actually ended up being able to let this go more than anything. I first said it to myself in the worst way possible, then it all started to make sense in a neutral tone.

This is probably the only positive usage for my terrible writing. I erase and rewrite a sentence so many times to get my full meanings carried out, then gradually over time as my mood stabilizes and more contents evolve into physical forms (both comprehensibly & incomprehensibly), things become slightly more settled. Mildly like a self-therapy session. With this I have better managed with impulsive messaging, which I realized over the years produce embarrassing and often irreversible results. Being impulsive is not enjoyable nor particularly something I want to associate myself with, and I feel sincerely sorry for those I heavily channel them to. These are some of the occasional cases when things sort of settle for itself. 

Well, I digressed. I must be asleep now to properly lead on life, to concentrate on things that do matter. Mostly because I am fairly tired right now and can no longer keep my attention straightforward. 
I waste enough hours on this whole ordeal, and hopefully the last of it. Now with all this, I'd like to say farewell to this friend. 

Just for record I'm going to post the response letter I wrote, but not for viewing. And the whole purpose of me telling you this is just for a sake of informing it's existence. 






Now I will vanish again. I just happened to come back to check a few things and this happened. I recently moved for a job and I have a lot to deal and fix. Hopefully things will settle soon!
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:iconrabbitibbar:
rabbitibbar Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2014
여기다 글 쓰고 위로 받으니 좋냐 븅신아?

미래 창녀년이 존나 사람들이 혓바닥으로 햝아주니 좋다고 지랄하네 ㅋㅋ
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:iconrabbitibbar:
rabbitibbar Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2014
미안해. 하지만 설명도 없이 그냥 그 아일 버린 너의 방식에 대해서도 문제가 있다고 생각해
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:iconrabbitibbar:
rabbitibbar Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2014
I heard you say often about peson who left YOU to your sister.
I believe he or she will think same way about you too. an obstacle. a left behind loser.
So how about stop complaining to your sister first?
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:iconsunflowerintherain:
SunflowerInTheRain Featured By Owner Mar 11, 2014  Student Traditional Artist
Been there and done it too. You did the right thing.
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:iconemptyshadow:
EmptyShadow Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2014
I guess this is just life of relationships. 
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:iconsunflowerintherain:
SunflowerInTheRain Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2014  Student Traditional Artist
Pretty much :/
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:iconcrazziikunoichii:
CrazziiKunoichii Featured By Owner Mar 5, 2014
Friendships will indeed come and go. Sometimes for the better, sometimes for the worst. Knowing a person for a long while, putting in trust and faith only to have it thrown or torn in your face, it's a pain that can't be forgotten easily. But, alas, it will make you a better person and improve you in ways you don't realise.

Good luck in your new work and I hope for the best outcome, keep strong and know you have people miles away supporting you.
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:iconemptyshadow:
EmptyShadow Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2014
The very nature of any type of relationships involve acceptance and rejection...success and failures...I think if we can embrace this concept, then we can heal a bit faster and move on with our lives. And you are right, it might feel like crap meeting & losing people, but it's all part of the learning and improvement process. 

Thank you for your good thoughts :hug:
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:iconcrazziikunoichii:
CrazziiKunoichii Featured By Owner Jul 1, 2014
Definitely.
It's hard to take in that perspective, but it all takes time.

You're welcome :hug:
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:iconannamaetezuka:
AnnamaeTezuka Featured By Owner Feb 16, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Sometimes friendships...end. Things go sour. And if it must be brought to an end, then so it must be. Good luck and :hug:.
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:iconemptyshadow:
EmptyShadow Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2014
THank you!
Reply
:iconannamaetezuka:
AnnamaeTezuka Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
You're welcome :)
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:iconexplodingapple:
explodingapple Featured By Owner Feb 15, 2014  Hobbyist
Emptyshadow I hope you survive what you're going through.  You're one of my favorite artists, and I hate to see any artist suffer for whatever the reason.

I would suggest drinking a delicious cup of hot chocolate.  That's all the advice I have.  I wish you have nothing but blue skies ahead of you.
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:iconemptyshadow:
EmptyShadow Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2014
Not much of a hot chocolate person, but I do like tea. It's a hot beverage regardless. 

Thanks much for your support. Needed it :hug:
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:iconyingodapenguin:
YingoDaPenguin Featured By Owner Feb 14, 2014
Good luck.
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:iconemptyshadow:
EmptyShadow Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2014
:hug:
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:iconkingviridian:
KingViridian Featured By Owner Feb 13, 2014
><; be safe 
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:iconemptyshadow:
EmptyShadow Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2014
Will do! Thank you 
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:iconthecreatorof4:
TheCreatorOf4 Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2014
._. Trains are scawy..
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:iconemptyshadow:
EmptyShadow Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2014
haha
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:iconsamurachan:
samurachan Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
i believe that the first feelings you had were all very human, we all have them. I noticed that in the process of the whole ordeal you grew, as in you learnt, you took the experience and learn a way to make the whole situation less hurtful to you. 
Because you learned and you used that learning.  I have to say I wish I could be like that and stop admiring how others get the job done. 
Best wishes in your new job. 
  :iconfezlaplz: :iconiloveyouplz:
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:iconemptyshadow:
EmptyShadow Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2014
Surely some people experience much worse fate and they somehow manage it, while making it look simple and subtle on the outside. I guess this is part of the process (:

Thank you for your good thoughts 
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:iconwalkermonetart:
WalkerMonetArt Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2014   Digital Artist
Do what best for you take care
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:iconemptyshadow:
EmptyShadow Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2014
thank you :hug:
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:iconblue-hybrid:
Blue-Hybrid Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I hope life treats you well!
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:iconemptyshadow:
EmptyShadow Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2014
Hope so, at least on average ;)
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:iconlp-chan:
LP-chan Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2014
please take care and work hard ;A; we'll miss you ;A: feel better soon
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:iconemptyshadow:
EmptyShadow Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2014
thank you thank you :hug:
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:iconlp-chan:
LP-chan Featured By Owner Jun 27, 2014
ty more for living ;A;
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:iconemptyshadow:
EmptyShadow Featured By Owner Jul 19, 2014
hope I live long :glomp:
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:iconlp-chan:
LP-chan Featured By Owner Jul 19, 2014
FOREVER???
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:iconxx-takashi-xx:
xx-takashi-xx Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2014
we all gotta step away sometimes and live life without the drama, i understand, but i hope you wont be away for a long period of time, you really do great work and i hope to see you post more again sometime in the future, good luck with all the stuff going on IRL though, its a harsh world right now with everyone fighting over work, so glad you found some =) take care and hurry back
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:iconemptyshadow:
EmptyShadow Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2014
Thank you :hug:
Reply
:iconalqaline-terr0r:
Alqaline-terr0r Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
I've had similar feelings to yours. I can relate to a lot of what you said here. I hope things go well in the future! :hug:
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:iconemptyshadow:
EmptyShadow Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2014
It's always great to know I"m not the only and that life moves on like for everyone else :hug:
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:iconalqaline-terr0r:
Alqaline-terr0r Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks. :)
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:iconjacob-cross:
Jacob-Cross Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2014
:nod:
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:iconemptyshadow:
EmptyShadow Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2014
;)
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:iconjacob-cross:
Jacob-Cross Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2014
:XD:
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:icondoodlz18:
Doodlz18 Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2014   Artist
Hope things get well soon
see you when you get back <:3
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:iconemptyshadow:
EmptyShadow Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2014
:glomp:
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:iconbihetho:
BiHetHo Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2014
Wow, that was deep. o.o New respect for you. 
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:iconemptyshadow:
EmptyShadow Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2014
AHa thanks for your kind words...
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:iconbihetho:
BiHetHo Featured By Owner Jul 9, 2014
Holy crap you talk! (That's-... A weird thing to catch me off guard. Of course you talk, what am I talking about?)
I can't tell if you're being serious or not, but either way you're welcome. =)
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:iconmimihatsune313:
mimihatsune313 Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2014  Hobbyist Artist
Best piec of literature i have ever read... I am crying from the sheer subtlety yet complicated work of art you just wrote!
I hope things go your way and that you come back as soon as you can manage to miss you :heart: 
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:iconemptyshadow:
EmptyShadow Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2014
Didn't expect that, but that surely cheers me up. Thank you for reading :hug:
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:iconmimihatsune313:
mimihatsune313 Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2014  Hobbyist Artist
your welcome!
Reply
:iconfyrepyromaniac:
Fyrepyromaniac Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Writing is an excellent form of therapy, often the first few pages of free writing get the 'crud' out of your brain's systems and can tell you clearly what you're worried about and fear, and want and who you're mad at and everything. Thanks for informing us a bit of what's going on. Glad you're becoming neutral to what's going on, too.
Wish ya the best!
Reply
:iconemptyshadow:
EmptyShadow Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2014
Heh, I agree. Thankfully the "crud" of my brain got purged in a rather satisfying manner, and I guess that's because I took it to writing. 

Thank you :hug:
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:iconfyrepyromaniac:
Fyrepyromaniac Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
<3
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February 11, 2014
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